Denver, Colo., Jan 30, 2019 / 04:05 am (CNA).- Pope John Paul II was born Karol Wojtyla, a man from a small town in Poland who lost all of his immediate family – mom, older brother, an infant sister, and father – by the time he was 20 years old. Shortly thereafter, he vowed a life of celibacy as a Catholic priest. And yet, Wojtyla would go on to be remembered as “Pope of the Family.”
25 years ago next week, on Feb. 2, 1994, Pope John Paul II penned his “Letter to Families,” the subject of which was spurred by the United Nations’ declaration that 1994 would be the “Year of the Family.”
At the time, U.S. divorce rates were higher – about 4.6 per 1,000 people, compared with 2.9 in 2017. But marriage rates were also higher – 9.1 compared with 6.9 for those same years. Legalized same-sex marriage was still considered a taboo political idea, and would remain so for more than a decade. And Bruce Jenner still went by Bruce Jenner.
But even though it was written 25 years ago, many Catholics in family life ministries believe that the Church is only beginning to see the fruits of John Paul II’s message to families.
Although he was a celibate priest, Wojtyla became very close to a circle of young people whom he pastored while serving as chaplain to university students in Krakow. As they married and had children, Fr. Wojtyla offered spiritual and pastoral guidance to their families that would inform his work well into his years as Pope John Paul II.
“He was able to support these young families, to help them live the faith at a time when Communist society was really trying to undermine the family,” said Jared Staudt, who is the director of formation for the Archdiocese of Denver, where he also leads Building Family Culture retreats for families.
When the Communist Party ruled Poland, family’s work and school schedules were arranged in such a way that they spent as little time together as possible. The state, and not the family, was, according to the government, the ultimate good and end of society.
“So he was in this battle for family life very directly in Communist Poland,” he said of Wojtyla.
Much of what Wojtyla came to know about the sanctity and importance of marriage and family life can be found in his 1994 “Letter to Families.”
Man, woman and child – the family as vocation
John Paul II wrote prolifically on the family, but this letter is one of his more personal and concise works detailing much of his thought on marriage and family.
He was known for elevating the idea of the vocation of marriage and family life to a level that had not yet been articulated in the Catholic Church.
“John Paul literally started a revolution when it comes to the Catholic Church and family,” said Steve Bollman, founder of family ministry Paradisus Dei.
“What John Paul did is he truly identified the family as the pathway to holiness,” Bollman said. “In this letter, it’s the family that’s placed at the heart of the great struggle between good and evil, between life and death, between love and all that’s opposed to love.”
In his letter, John Paul II wrote that men and women, particularly in their roles as fathers and mothers in the family, are key to building up a “civilization of love,” in which families are able to give and receive love at individual and societal levels.
“If the first ‘way of the Church’ is the family, it should also be said that the civilization of love is also the ‘way of the Church’, which journeys through the world and summons families to this way; it summons also other social, national and international institutions, because of families and through families. The family in fact depends for several reasons on the civilization of love, and finds therein the reasons for its existence as family. And at the same time the family is the centre and the heart of the civilization of love,” John Paul II wrote (LTF 13).
Bollman said that by telling families that they were at the heart of the Church, it called them to holiness in a way that hadn’t yet been articulated.
“The vast majority of people become holy as a husband and father and wife and mother, not in spite of that,” Bollman said. John Paul II’s teachings on the family are at the foundation of Bollman’s work at Paradisus Dei, which includes a couple’s ministry, and That Man is You, a ministry for men that particularly focuses on their roles as husbands and fathers.
“Our tagline is, “Helping families discover the superabundance of God.” That’s what we are is we’re all about family and finding God within the family,” he said.
The family in crisis
Staudt called John Paul II’s letter “prophetic”, because it addresses not only the crucial importance of the family’s place in society, but some of the key ways it is under attack.
And if attacks on the family were urgent in 1994, they are all the more so today, Staudt said.
“John Paul’s famous line from the letter: ‘The history of mankind, the history of salvation, passes by way of the family,’ is actually chilling at this point,” Staudt noted, “because what we’re seeing is that we don’t have hope for the future, we’re not investing for the future of society or for the Church. We’re just living for the present moment for our own selfish desires. So I think John Paul was already recognizing that the foundation of society itself is already in jeopardy, if people are not getting married, if they’re not having kids, they’re saying no to the future.”
According to Pew Research, the marriage rate in the United States is currently hovering at around 50 percent, meaning half of U.S. adults aged 18 and older are married, a steep decline compared to the peak rate of 72 percent in 1960. The fertility rate is also at a 30-year low in the United States, and sits below replacement levels. As of 2014, less than half of children were living in a traditional nuclear home with their married mother and father.
By many measures, marriage and family life today are in crisis, in ways that are perhaps even more pronounced than when John Paul II wrote this letter.
“I think the ‘crisis of concepts’ that John Paul II speaks of is an enormous challenge for the family today,” Sr. John Mary, S.V., of the Sisters of Life, told CNA.
“Who can deny that our age is one marked by a great crisis, which appears above all as a profound ‘crisis of truth?’” John Paul II wrote. “A crisis of truth means, in the first place, a crisis of concepts. Do the words ‘love’, ‘freedom’, ‘sincere gift’, and even ‘person’ and ‘rights of the person’, really convey their essential meaning?” This crisis now seems to be even more profound than when the Pope first wrote these words, Sr. John Mary, S.V., a Sister of Life, told CNA.
“Even more so today than when the Letter to Families was written, modern culture does not recognize the truth of who the human person is, what we are made for, what constitutes a family, what freedom and human rights are,” she said. “So to truly live Christian family life becomes more and more radically countercultural. John Paul II addresses this in the letter by proposing the anthropology that corrects this crisis of concepts and allows for a civilization of love to grow by way of marriage and family,” she noted.
Another major challenge faced by families is the “radical individualism” present in current culture, Sr. John Mary said, which is something else John Paul II addressed in the letter.
According to John Paul II, radical individualism is “based on a faulty notion of freedom and proposes personalism as the antidote,” Sr. John Mary said. “The family is the first place where love is given and received. But if parents do not model authentic, self-giving love to their children, families become groups of persons pursuing their own selfish ends,” she said.
The ‘antidote’: John Paul II’s cure for a sick society
Though John Paul II’s descriptions of these crises and the current state of affairs of marriage and family in the world paint a dark picture, John Paul also provides for families and the Church a way out.
Bill Donaghy is a senior lecturer and content specialist with the Theology of the Body Institute. The mission of the Institute is to educate and train men and women to understand, live, and promote John Paul II’s teachings in his Theology of the Body.
Donaghy told CNA that not only does he consider John Paul II’s Letter to Families the blueprint to how to live a holy life personally as a husband and father, he also considers it the “antidote” to everything that goes against a “civilization of love.”
“Without a doubt in my mind, in the providence of God Who could foresee today’s crisis in marriage and the family, the attempt to redefine marriage and the explosion of gender ideologies that detach our identity from our humanity, St. John Paul II’s thought is the antidote, the cure, the clear truth of who we are and how we are to live as human persons made by Love,” he said.
“I think the vision presented in this letter is actually more relevant now than it was 25 years ago,” he said. “It contains the secret for our joy, the mystical meaning of marriage, the way home for the prodigal sons and daughters who’ve tried everything else to bring us joy and failed to find it.”
For himself, Donaghy said building the “civilization of love” starts in his own home – by treating his wife with love and respect, by spending time with and listening to his children, by modeling sacrificial love. At the parish level, he said the Church must help families by creating space for “real human interaction, conversation, and formation.”
“Again, the ‘Letter to Families’ is a goldmine of a teaching, a school of love for humanity. But we’ve got to make time and space for it to enter into the everyday dynamics of our own family,” he said.
Staudt too told CNA that the words and teachings of Pope John Paul II on the family have deeply inspired his work in family ministry.
“It really is through John Paul’s teachings, the letter and his other teachings…that I’ve discerned that the way to build Christian culture is through family life,” Staudt, who is also the father of 6, told CNA.
For the Building Family Culture retreats that he leads, Staudt said that he focuses on teaching families how to pray, the importance of which is heavily emphasized by John Paul II in his letter.
“Prayer must become the dominant element of the Year of the Family in the Church: prayer by the family, prayer for the family, and prayer with the family,” John Paul II wrote. “Prayer increases the strength and spiritual unity of the family, helping the family to partake of God’s own ‘strength.’”
“I think we take that for granted, that families know how to pray, and I don’t think they do. So I think that’s the foundation, that’s the core, and John Paul does talk a lot about that,” he said. After prayer, he also focuses on how to build a family culture, which includes doing things that form children’s imagination in positive and beautiful ways.
Staudt said he hopes that more in family ministry “wake up” to the urgency of helping families become what John Paul II has called them to be.
“I don’t think enough people have woken up to the urgency in supporting family life and really making that a priority in their parishes, their dioceses, in catechesis, in evangelization,” he said.
“John Paul I think is truly prophetic in pointing us to the fundamental realities of man, woman, human love, family life as crucial for the Church and society at this time, that these are the key issues that we need to face.”
Sr. John Mary and the Sisters of Life say they help build a “civilization of love” through the women they help in crisis pregnancies, the women they counsel after abortions, or the young people who are early on in their journey of faith.
Sr. John May said that because John Paul II was speaking about universal truths of the human person, his words will continue to be relevant for families and the Church throughout time. “John Paul’s Letter to Families explores universal truths: the goodness of the human person, the dignity of marriage, and the very real challenges facing families today,” she said. “Marriage and family are God’s plan to satisfy the universal longings of the human heart, so speaking of them is always timely.”
“We are all called to do something great with our life and our love,” she added. “We are made for love and communion with God and others. John Paul II reminds us of this lofty call, and encourages us that true love is possible.”
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No Catholic in good standing can vote for any candidate who campaigns for the killing of unborn defenseless children.
Nor for a grossly immoral candidate who flaunts our constitutional form of government and has even waffled on pro life issues. A man who is dangerous and can’t be trusted. Friends we are in serious trouble!
It is sad and funny that Catholics criticize Trump on moral grounds. The most disgusting immoral President was the JFK and Biden is nor far behind in his lack of morals. JFK almost got us into WW3 and Biden has started 2 wars so far.
History credits JFK with getting us out of the cuban missile crisis with back door diplomacy through the work of Bobby Kennedy allowing Khrushchev to save face. I am no fan of the Kennedy family but this is a fact that we can’t ignore.
O my goodness, and how the bishops pandered to Hispanics by trashing Trump, having Mass at the wall with the press in tow, cozying up to Biden … only to find out Hispanics are as smart as most other Americans. Now, bishops, you’re out there on a limb. Hope you don’t land too hard and trash your miters. That’s right, you’ve squandered your teaching authority once again. And you wonder why regular Catholics no longer pay you any mind? And you’re going to find out soon enough the pay off for jumping on the BLM/George Floyd bandwagon last election cycle. You have it coming.
jpfhays, you put it so succinctly and accurately. Most of our bishops are feckless sycophants – followers of that Great Accommodationist, Francis I.
I’m guessing the US bishops are already aware of this but more & more Hispanics are Evangelical & Pentecostal & those are socially conservative folk.
Biden is a “Catholic president”?
Well then…
Hitler’s family was Catholic. So I guess that means Hitler was a Catholic fürher, eh?
I know, I know. It’s disrespectful — and not accurate — to compare Biden to Hitler.
You’re right. I’m sorry.
After all, Germany only murdered three or four dozens of millions of people during Hitler’s rule.
While Biden’s holocaust numbers in the many hundreds of millions around the world during his half century in office.
Recently, I heard a statement I found interesting: Democrats have not carried a majority of male voters (all males – white, black, Hispanic) since LBJ in 1964. My very limited research tends to support this as accurate. I’m willing to be corrected by the really smart CWR readers.
No REAL Catholic would choose to vote in the ’24 election.
Any Catholic who decides to vote this year is announcing to the world that their faith means less than nothing to them and politics are more important than Jesus. 😡
This message was brought to you by the Biden/Harris Campaign Committee.
🙂
“All that is necessary for evil to triumph, is for good men to do NOTHING.” If you fail to vote, you effectively join the crowd with blood on their hands.
Its like voting for a third party candidate who you know CANNOT win as away of virtue signaling. It steal votes from the better candidate, and effectively allows the side that lies and cheats to win.
Some choice. Most Americans do not want this choice, but here we are. Again and again, we are faced with the “lesser of two evils.”
the last person i want in the white house is that no good loser trump
hmmm…so i guess its ok for trump to fool around with porn stars and support abortion???
you people drive me crazy. trump belongs in prison, not the white house!
So, I guess it’s ok for Bill Clinton to harass multiple women and for Hillary to help him cover that up? I guess it’s ok for Andrew Cuomo to harass 14 women and counting? I guess it’s ok for Barack Obama to sow racial divisions in the country and support partial birth abortions? Is voting for a democrat really any type of morally sound alternative when you look at the facts?
Ideally, I prefer my politicians without porn stars. But I have yet to meet a person who is perfect and without weakness. In the final analysis, I am MORE concerned about how their POLICIES affect our country and our people. We are voting for a President, not a saint. Only the dimmest cant see that stirring up accusations about a persons sexual activity is simply a way to damage them politically. I would not vote for a political party like that with a gun to my head.
Answer honestly. What does more damage to more people? An open border, a refusal to enforce criminal laws, and a two tiered justice system, or a politician dating a porn star?
I prefer my presidents without porn stars too, LJ.
😁
But we take what we can get and there are only two viable options at the moment. One’s associated with porn stars, the other with cognitive decline.
Not that very long ago, Democratic elected officials like Joseph Biden DID vote for pro-life bills, and the Democratic Party was considered “the party of the little man (and what is littler than an embryo or fetus?!). But now the few pro-life Democrats who are strong enough in their soul to remain prolife, e.g., Rep. Dan Lipinski of Illinois, are basically hounded and hated out of office. The problem is that the basic concept of the “Republican” party is individual freedom–which means that there will still be plenty of pro-choice” Republicans. The only hope is to pray for more private citizens to recognize the scientific and spiritual reasons to be “pro-life” and demand that their elected officials of ANY political party support the right of the unborn to live! Voting Republican is no guarantee that pro-life laws will be passed and upheld. I do plan to vote for Pres. Trump at this time (not only because of pro-life issues but because he has a better grasp of what is necessary for a strong economy, and he is respected (or perhaps feared?!) by other world leaders. However, we still have a few more months for God to work a miracle!
Alex, for 500 points. Question: Who wrote the following:
“… it is my personal feeling that the legalization of abortion on demand is not in accordance with the value which our civilization places on human life.”
Answer “Who is Ted Kennedy” (1971)
Hard to believe but true: https://www.ncregister.com/blog/the-story-behind-kennedy-s-pro-life-letter
Thank you for sharing that article, Ron.
What a sad example of how we betray our faith for worldly success. I’d say betrayal of our convictions also, but that assumes a sincere conviction in the first place.
For every Ted Kennedy and Joe Biden there’s a lifetime of Catholic clergy who have enabled them to get to that place of moral error. At Judgement the shepherds will be held to a higher accountability than the sheep.
Happy Mothers (Mary and own mother) Month . Catholics who vote for Trump did not comprehend, imbibe and get well the Catholic values taught by their mothers. How could one vote for a narcissist, liar, cheat, misogynist, sexist, racist, rapist, insurrectionist, criminal defendant, who has no God but himself.
My mother had commonsense Deacon Dom & she taught me to make practical choices.
Based upon the performance of either candidate while they were in office, I’m choosing Trump. I base my vote on previous performance , not campaign hype.
Well, you supported the Clinton’s and B. Hussein Obama. What does that say about your own faith and values?
You are basing a lot of your accusations of Pres. Trump on a corrupt and ultra-liberal media’s slant. These folks lie through their teeth. I’m sure some of it is true, but…if you want an indication of how Pres. Trump lives in his private life, just take a look at his children, including his youngest son, Barron. These kids are amazing–they started working in their dad’s company when they were 16 and were required to work at every “job” to be able to understand what the employees do. After Pres. Trump was elected, Barron came under an attack by the “media”_-and Melania (his mom) promptly left the White House with her son and took him to a private place in NYC where the media couldn’t get at him. Pres. Trump had no objection. I would suggest that you read VP Mike Pence’s biography in which he discusses Pres. Trump in detail and for the most part, until the Jan. 6 debacle, is quite complimentary about Pres. Trump. Pence has been a devout Christian from his childhood–he grew up Catholic and converted to Evangelical Protestantism later in life–so he’s not one to stretch the truth or tell lies. And be wary about believing the media. One “story” about Pres. Trump that they haven’t reported is all the “small charities” that he has funded, including an amazing organization in NYC called Figure Skating In Harlem. In the beginning, the coach spent all her own money funding this excellent organization, which has a 99.9% high school graduation rate among the mainly minority girls who are members. Donald Trump heard about the organization (he was involved with re-building a NYC figure skating rink) and stepped in with a large donation. I don’t know if he is still involved, but at this point, Figure Skating in Harlem is supported by many A-list celebrities who also serve on the board (e.g., Al Roker). But it was Donald Trump who kept it alive in the beginning. You’ve never heard that, have you? Maybe Pres. Trump isn’t as bad as you think.
“criminal defendant”
I’m going to ignore the rest of what you spewed and focus on this.
You do dealize that being a defendant in a criminal case doesn’t mean that a person is a criminal, right? There’s a little thing called “presumption of innocence.”
And even in the cases of people convicted, there are also some who are wrongly convicted, and prosecutors who abuse the law to promote their own political agendas.
Happy Mother’s Day/Month. Those Catholics who vote for Trump must have failed to comprehend or imbibe the Catholic values taught by their mothers. How could they vote for a narcissist, liar, cheat, misogynist, racist, rapist, insurrectionist, criminal defendant, and who has no God but himself.
Most German voters in the early 1930’s didn’t think the Nazis were serious about all that extremist stuff, either. History has a way of repeating itself.
It seems to be doing that on our college campuses today, Marlene. Plus ca change…
To Deacon Dom, and some others in this comment section – even if she were alive, we are never going to have a Mother Theresa running for president. Trump gave us Supreme Court justices that overturned Roe and sent it back to the states. All of the national and state pro-life groups that I saw praised this at the time. So, going back to the states wasn’t as good as many of us hoped. Hardly Trump’s fault.
Given the choices that we have, I don’t see how anyone cannot see the difference between Trump and Biden, who is not only for abortion but wants to increase it with a national pro-abortion law. Biden, and his campaign manager have said that their key campaign issue is going to be a stand as the pro-abortion candidate.
If Trump does win, I believe that we will then be hearing from the bishops, calling out Trump by name, for trying to close the border to illegals.
The democrat party is the pro death party as evidenced by their platform which calls for the killing of unborn babies anytime, anyplace, for any reason, paid for by the government.
I get the impression that so many Catholics are so tied to the democrat party that they refuse to see moral realty, and that goes also for bishops, half of whom in my state are registered members of the party of death.
Bravo, Crusader!
The Democratic Party is indeed a death cult. They are in favor of:
Abortion, to the tune of a third of the children conceived in America for the past half century; open borders, over which deadly drugs are allowed to pour in unimpeded; the mutilation and sterilization of “trans” children without the consent of the parents; drug legalization; foreign aid for the nation that is the biggest supporter of terrorism in the world; some ten million illegal aliens, totally unvetted, being allowed into the country and receiving welfare and services while U.S. families struggle to survive; euthanasia — and so much more.
Catholics who vote for Democrats should look to their souls.
A Catholic would make a big mistake voting for the figre head in the White House or not voting at all. That Catholic would be contributing to the victory of a clear pro abortion candidate and party (I leave out the many other anti Christian and anti national positions they hold). With all his folds, DT is on our side; the other is not. DT has appointed more pro life judges than any president. He is pro life. The other is not. DT tries to save as many children as possible with his leaving abortion to the states, not the Feds. The other wants the Feds to control and push abortion. DT is against all the anti children policies the other holds from transgender to lgbtq plus, etc. Catholics, this is a no brainer decision. And by the way, with all his faults, see what a good bunch of boys DT has raised, who love his father. Compare with the present figure head and his children, one of whom he used to take showers with when she was a girl, as she has recollected in her diary, found in a house for drug addicts (she has drug and sexual promiscuity problems). Once more, folks, this is a no brainer at election time. Go and vote for the much better candidate.