Denver, Colo., Mar 24, 2020 / 04:00 am (CNA).- Ian, a 30 year-old living and working in an addiction recovery community in southern Florida, is somewhat used to paradoxical living conditions. Ian has been clean and sober for ten years, and he lives in an area he says is densely populated with recovering addicts. Seven minutes from his house, though, is spring break territory.
Ian finds the contrast puzzling.
“(The surrounding) community is very spring break-esque, but it’s also the largest recovery community in the United States. It’s the largest recovery community for people that are getting sober or staying sober…so it’s just weird because it’s two polar extremes,” he told CNA.
Last week highlighted the differences between the communities even more, as the sober living community observed social distancing and isolation per federal coronavirus guidelines, while hordes of spring-break revelers hit the beach and blithely partied on.
“It’s really polarized at this point,” Ian said. “There are people that are clearly trying to keep their space, and then there’s people that just don’t care.”
‘It’s affected everything’
Spring breakers notwithstanding, the addiction recovery community in Florida and across the United States is scrambling to make group and sponsor meetings as available and effective as possible, while observing federal and state guidelines which dictate that no more than 10 people may gather together, and in some cases, that people cannot leave their homes except for essential supplies and emergencies.
“It’s really affected everything,” Ian said of the coronavirus restrictions.
Ian told CNA he qualifies for membership in multiple 12-step programs, including Heroin Anonymous, but that he has remained the most active in Alcoholics Anonymous.
Despite what people might think about Alcoholics Anonymous meetings based on movies or T.V. shows, Ian said that the primary reason for in-person meetings is not so much therapy as it is to offer a place for newcomers to meet others in recovery and to find a sponsor.
“The idea is that someone who is brand new has a place to go where they can meet someone who’s not brand new, and in that process get involved with the 12 steps,” he said. “It’s the catalyst of all other things, i.e., the newcomer really getting involved with the 12 steps.”
“If you bring them to a group that is really enthusiastic…they get almost attacked by people that are trying to help people. And so before you even know it, you’ve got a sponsor,” and a community, or at least the prospect of onem he added.
Involvement in Alcoholics Anonymous varies from person to person, but typically, a member of AA attends meetings at least once a week (often more frequently), and has regular meetings with a sponsor, who is usually a member with more years in recovery offering guidance through the 12 steps of recovery.
While coronavirus restrictions have put a damper on in-person interactions, Ian said he and his friends anticipated that lockdowns and quarantines were possible in the face of coronavirus, and they worked to put together Zoom online conference meetings, as well as a master spreadsheet of anyone available to sponsor new people.
“We’re going to be actually sending this to every local halfway house and treatment center and saying, ‘Hey, if you have new people that need sponsors, all of these people are willing to take as many as possible until it becomes unbearable,’” he said.
Back to the roots
“Father C”, a priest in Pennsylvania who is in recovery from alcohol addiction, spoke to CNA on the condition of anonymity. He said that in some ways, remote ways of connecting people in recovery to one another are a throwback to the early days of Alcoholics Anonymous, when the organization, founded in 1935, reached new people primarily by telephone.
“Groups only got organized because one alcoholic reached out to another and shared the message of his own recovery through the practice and the steps,” “Father C” told CNA.
Before they had texting or other digital ways of organizing meetings, “two people meeting together…even on the telephone, was a meeting to them,” he said.
Only after the telephone became more common in American homes, and the word about Alcoholics Anonymous got out, were organizers able to establish bigger group meetings.
Dave, a Catholic father of six in recovery in Maryland, said that mail was also used in the early days of AA.
“So the history is that Bill Wilson got sober in New York and Dr. Bob Smith got sober in Akron, Ohio. And Bill was in Ohio at the time when they started; Bill got Bob sober. And then they hung out and they would go to these Oxford Group meetings. Oxford Group is a Protestant group that had some of the basic tenants of AA,” he said.
“When Alcoholics Anonymous started, it was mainly these disparate groups of people that would exchange letters before there were meetings everywhere. So it’s a little bit of how things were in the beginning, but just with a 21st century spin on it,” he added.
More isolation, but more ways to connect
Joelle is a wife and mother in her 50s in Fresno, California who has been in recovery through AA for 10 years. She serves as an event planner for AA (though, all upcoming events have been canceled).
The move to virtual meetings means that newcomers will have to be especially proactive about reaching out for help, Joelle told CNA.
“We have a principle, a little refrain, that we say. It’s: ‘When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, we want the hand of AA to always be there. And for that I am responsible.’ Well, in this time, (newcomers) really are going to have to reach out. They’re going to have to find us,” Joelle added.
“Because usually somebody drops into a meeting and they don’t leave that meeting without some phone numbers and exchanging numbers so that they don’t get lost in AA. But, obviously that’s not possible right now.”
The “big saving grace” at the moment has been videoconferencing, Joelle said. The groups with which she’s involved have set up online conference meetings via Zoom, and put the word out via Facebook and word of mouth about the change. So far, attendance has been high.
“One of the meetings I go to is an every-morning-meeting, every day of the week, at 6:30 a.m. And a lot of the people who come to that meeting, they’re kind of hit-and-miss because some days they need to be at work at 7:30 and coming to a 6:30 meeting doesn’t make sense. But now that we’re on Zoom, all of them are coming,” she said.
They’re also picking up people from other groups who have not yet organized virtual meetings, she said.
“So our meeting is bigger and more vital than ever. I also think the stressful situation makes people want more AA meetings.”
Joelle said she sees this time as “kind of a mixed bag.”
One the one hand, she said, social isolation can be really bad for addicts. She predicts that a lot of people will discover during their time of social isolation that they are alcoholics or drug addicts.
“There’s going to be people who figure out they’re alcoholic during this time because being trapped at home, instead of busy with work and activities, heavy drinkers are very likely going to figure out that there’s an issue there,” she said. “But how are they going to get ahold of us?”
Because 12-step groups typically happen locally, Joelle said she would encourage those looking for a meeting to do an internet search with the name of their city plus “AA meetings,” or whichever recovery group they need.
“You’re going to find all kinds of meetings,” she said. She encouraged newcomers and those long in recovery to take advantage of extra time at home to connect to even more virtual meetings than they might normally be able to attend in person.
“I would say we need more connection, not less, when there’s stress,” Joelle said. “So home isolation is really rough for an alcoholic. But being able to attend more meetings because you’re sitting at home and so you don’t have conflict…in some ways it’s more convenient for people now. In other ways, you’re still sitting at home by yourself.”
Joelle said she thinks this time might pave the way for more virtual meetings in the future for AA, even after the threat of coronavirus has passed.
“AA already has conference call meetings, which I know is kind of old-fashioned, dial-in meetings…but from my perspective, there’s plenty of times when you would want to have someone able to Zoom in, because maybe they’ve got cancer and they’re in chemo, and so they’re stuck at home, they can’t come. I really believe this will be the wave of the future in terms of giving people more options.”
The steps at a social distance
While being able to host online meetings has been convenient in many ways, Ian said he still had many concerns about people in recovery programs, particularly those who are in early recovery.
Often, those in early recovery will take part-time jobs as restaurant servers or cashiers so they can focus on their recovery, Ian said, but a “huge influx” of people are losing such jobs in his community, he said.
“We’re just having a lot of people not only not have an income, but also not be able to participate both in meetings and fellowship, which is as, if not equally, important as meeting attendance,” he said. Fellowship typically involves 40-50 people or so going out for dinner or just hanging out together after meetings. Get-togethers of that size are now banned throughout the country.
Ian said he is also concerned about newcomers who were working the steps for the first time, because, somewhat like the sacraments of the Catholic Church, there is something particularly effective about completing those steps in person.
For example, he said, the fourth step of AA, which is to make “a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves,” is typically undertaken in person, with one’s sponsor. It is similar to the sacrament of confession, where sins are stated to a priest in person.
“There’s something about doing that face to face with someone and seeing someone’s face not judging you,” he said. “Like someone looking at you and being like, ‘He doesn’t think I’m a scumbag or a loser.’”
“When you remove that facial component, even through FaceTime, you’ve obviously diminished the effectiveness or efficacy of that step,” he said. “So there’s all these other underlying limitations that we’re going to tease out over the next few weeks or months potentially.”
Staying close to God when Masses are canceled
Another component of recovery that will be challenging for Catholics at this time will be remaining close to God when all public Masses and other liturgical celebrations have been canceled throughout the United States.
Connecting with a higher power is crucial for all 12-step recovery programs, but doing so can be hard for Catholics who can’t attend Mass or go to confession regularly due to coronavirus restrictions.
Christine N., a Catholic in recovery in Annapolis, Maryland, said she was “devastated” when Masses were canceled, because she had recently been trying to attend daily Mass as well as Sunday Mass. Now, she said, she’s been watching her local parish’s livestream of morning Mass, and she said she might watch Bishop Robert Barron’s streamed Masses as well.
She encouraged fellow alcoholics and others in recovery to stay the course and to trust God.
“I, and all Catholics, need to continue to pray and have faith that God will never abandon us and that he is with us,” she said. “Believe that, and we’ll get through it. But it definitely feels like a test.”
Dave said that he and his family are part of a movement, started in France, called Teams of Our Lady, which are small faith groups that meet monthly for a shared meal and fellowship, and they also have a rule of life by which they try to live. Their group just had their first online meeting yesterday.
Dave said he encourages Catholics to find virtual ways to connect and share about their faith with other Catholics or Christians.
“I think we have to be willing to share more openly with other people of our faith of what’s going on, share the difficulties, and connect (with each other),” he said, adding that he had also heard of stay-at-home virtual retreats being put on by some priests in Maryland.
Joelle said that for the past few weeks, she has been saying a daily rosary and a morning meditation and turning to prayer more often throughout the day. She encouraged Catholics to “stay out of fear” and to look for ways that God is calling them to be of service every day.
“I am constantly looking for the role that God is assigning me right now,” she said.
“I want to focus on the present and especially on being in service in the present…for me it means using my cooking skills and time to get meals to people who are shut in, especially to people over 65 or who otherwise have health concerns. To be able to take them a meal and leave it on their doorstep and make sure they’re okay, and go grocery shopping for them so they aren’t exposed. Those are things that help Catholics and they help alcoholics too.”
“Father C” said he thinks it is fitting that Catholics are all experiencing a great spiritual hunger for the sacraments during Lent. He said his advice for Catholics in recovery is similar to his advice for other addicts in recovery: “Keep coming back.”
“Stay close, be involved, do service even in the smallest things,” he said. “Think of one another and pray for one another. Even with the social distance, there needn’t be spiritual distance.”
“If God will make the greatest good come forth on the greatest evil, the death of the Son, well, would not God be able and willing to make good come out of this, even those lives that end up being lost to it?” he added.
[…]
The Catholic Thing, Dec, 9 – If one is right, the other is wrong.
Former Catholic doing what she does best: using her elected office in government to destroy all that the Catholic Church believes and teaches. I suspect that Nancy studied at the feet of William Tecumseh Sherman. Good work, Nancy.
Sherman did not destroy all that the Catholic Church believes and teaches. Sadly, although he was baptized and raised by an adoptive family that was strongly Catholic, after some years he did not practice the Faith and disagreed with the Church. But his wife was extremely devout and active and the children were all sent to Catholic schools. One of his sons became a priest, though that caused Sherman some bitterness, bit he never sought to destroy the Church’s beliefs or teachings.
Kindly don’t insult him by comparing Pelosi to him.
Yes. He was instrumental in defeating the Confederacy and ending the Civil War after all. That’s kind of a big deal. His biographies are interesting reading.
What I always find interesting is the contemporary southerner women shrieking, “He’s a beast and a monster!” and yet you see story after story about how they mouthed off to him, and lived to tell the tale. Some monster.
Yes, I agree about his biographies. They are very interesting.
There is a charming story about his meeting 4-year-old Juliette Gordon Low in Savannah at the end of the war; her father was a captain in the Confederate army, and her mother’s brothers were serving in the US Army. Sherman was a friend of one of them and went to see Mrs. Gordon to give her messages from her family. Juliette and her sister had been curious about seeing “Old Sherman” in the march through Savannah the previous day, and their mother told Sherman so, while the little girls each protested that it was the other who had called him that. Sherman laughed, and then talked to and entertained the little girls for hours.
And before the war Sherman was in charge of what later became Louisiana State University. In one battle one of his former staff members was captured, and Sherman introduced him to someone as “This is (whatever the name was); he thinks he’s a Confederate officer but he’s really my professor of ancient languages.”
General Sherman may not have destroyed all things Catholic but he sure left a path of misery and destruction behind him.
I think his son who became a Catholic priest is buried in Grand Coteau, Louisiana next to a close relative of the Confederate Vice President.
We read: “Nancy Pelosi, a Catholic, called the act a ‘historic step forward in Democrats’ fight to defend the dignity and equality of every American.’”
Nice touch, that. This “historic” step in the most recent microseconds of human history! For talking heads, the notion now that some states can impose their rites (vs “rights”?) on other states, and even on the real rights of individual citizens (“equality of every American”) of other states? Constitution, what Constitution?
Wondering here if Her Majesty has witlessly teed up the ball (so to speak) for the inevitable Constitutional court case? Recalling not only Justice Thomas, but also Chief Justice Roberts in his earlier dissent to Obergefell v Hodges (2015): “Do not celebrate the Constitution. It had nothing to do with it.”
We might as well notice, too, whether the issue is no longer fenced-in to the redefinition of “marriage”? (And, such an insult to all members of the human race by insinuating an equivalence to interracial marriage!)
So. . .Is the real issue now about the redefinition of the nation-state, itself? The “state” now mutated into a lapdog in the Pavlovian hands of an unnatural mindset in all of its slippery-slope mutations? Does the redefined state now exist simply to salivate over and ratify a full range of possible redefinitions (“fatwas”?): gay marriage, but also polygamy, and then polyamorous block parties, and eventually even beastiality?
Pelosi’s open-ended redefinition of marriage, butt now especially the “state”: the tail wagging the dog?
It’s a very sad state of affairs where this has gone and of course Biden will sign since he’s a Catholic in name only, like Pelosi. But don’t worry, God is not mocked and what’s coming to America will show that you do not mess with God and His commandments !
I’m sure Biden will not sign since he is a devout Catholic….it would go against everything he has been taught since his youth and am sure he sought the advice and counsel of the Pope.
At the very least, Biden is at this moment consulting with his bishop (Washington or Wilmington????) about what a FAITHFUL Catholic ought to do. I’m certain that his episcopal advisor will show him the moral high road to take. We are all in good hands when we first consult our bishops when faced with weighty moral issues.
My Eposicial adviser is from Germany!
Didn’t his mother threaten/tell off a nun because of something that happened at his school, or do I have that story mixed up?
He always talked about taking Trump out behind the school gymnasium.
Opening a pandora’s box.
Pelosi conflated this bill with the decision in Dobbs, as if the two were related. Oh, wait, they are related. Both cases promote immorality. Once again, Cardinal Josef Ratzinger comes to mind. Later voted Pope Benedict XVI, he stated, “Truth is not determined by a majority vote.” No matter how many people think something is right, it doesn’t make it so.
Maybe someone in her family will utilize, possibly……………………
If the hierarchy had gone all-in on the promotion of NFP, especially in their hospitals systems, then they might not be where they find themselves.
Is NFP conscious, deliberate birth control? Just asking.
It depends on how you define “birth control.” NFP is not contraception, unless you want to consider abstaining from sex contraception.
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Observing a women’s fertility signs and then making a decision about whether to engage in, or not engage in, procreative activity does not offend the Church’s (God’s) prohibition on contraception
NFP is not contraception.
Marriage is the union of a man and a woman – yesterday today tomorrow – forever, and the nonsense which the ‘catholics’ and their pals in the house and senate insist in indulging in will NOT change that.
The ‘respect for marriage act’ – what a mockery.
“Whatever I tell you in the dark, speak in the light; and what you hear in the ear, preach on the housetops. And do not fear those who would kill the body for they cannot kill the soul. Instead fear Him who is able to destroy both the soul and body in Hell.” The fact that Americans no longer fear the Lord will lead to the destruction of this nation from within and without in one years time.
Some years ago as Vice President Biden performed a gay”wedding” ceremony – with scarcely any response by the bishops. For decades, politicians have trumpeted their Catholic identity while vigorously promoting abortion and same sex marriage. Few have faced any consequences from the Church. They continue to receive Communion and are virtually immune to any correction from the Church. The Archbishop of Washington is notably reluctant to uphold Church teaching in these areas.
And when Pelosi, Biden, et. al. die,they can expect an elaborate Catholic funeral as Ted Kennedy, Mario Cuomo, etc. received.
I cannot help wondering if our bishops simply prefer peace, unity (and perhaps popularity) to the truth. Or, do they not believe the teaching of the Church themselves?
Looking everyday that the “Catholic Church” may not be the true church it claims to be. A modern day synagogue of satan as Jesus would say.
If the Catholic Bishops would only become politically vocal on the moral issues of the day instead of cowardly shying from the public square this country could be turned around in short order. I blame the Catholic Bishops, not Catholic politicians ignorant of the Faith, for the passage of this same sex marriage bill.
Half the annual budget of the USCCB comes from the Feds. “Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.”
Honestly, if the Church lost her 5013c tax status and lost her ability to get federal funds, that might be one of the best things to happen to her
Does the ‘Respect for Marriage’ law say as to whether or not it is going to ‘discriminate’ against man-boy-lovers, marriage to animals, or marriage to inanimate objects?
I can clearly see the legal problems with the ‘Respect for marriage’ law. Let us take a look at the pregnant 41 year old school teacher having sex with her 15 year old student. Even in jail for doing so, she now would have a right to marry her 15 year old lover, “to put the family back together”. The ‘wolf in sheeps clothing’ Progressive, Liberal, Socialist, Marxist Democrats next step is to help her fight ‘unconstitutional’, ‘age discrimination’, Federal laws which stand in the way of her ‘right’ to marry the one she loves.
After the school teacher wins her battle for her “rights”, it will be 50 year old male man-boy-lovers wanting to marry their 5 year old lovers.
https://youtu.be/ZnKB9NzgD4k
Florida teacher charged with having sex with student, 15, is now pregnant
https://nypost.com/2021/10/11/florida-teacher-pregnant-after-being-arrested-for-having-sex-with-student/
What ever happened to the sanctity of the sacrament of Matrimony?
Agreed. If the Catholic Bishops cannot be vocal on moral issues, what really is their purpose?
All these silly little people will someday be called to account, and they will have much to answer for.
The Church is the moral compass for Catholics—not the Federal government. The Church defines marriage for Catholics—-not the Federal government. Whatever happens in Washington DC never changes the teachings of the Church. Church leaders do not make policy in the Federal government and politicians do not make policy for the Church. Anyone who thinks the Church and the Federal government are equals are creating a golden calf. Catholics only pledge allegiance to God and nobody else. The Federal government should be ignored because it never dictates how Catholics are to live their lives.
People listen to the government because they keep writing out checks.
Government money is certainly a large part of this. That and human respect.
What will matter in the end is the question as to whether or not our church leaders have a spine. Or will they all simply cave in, in a heap as they did when it was demanded they close our churches for covid? ( Note: I am almost 70, have experienced covid twice. Clearly, I am not dead!) My point being, the feds can pass any law they want, fine you however much they want. In the end, they cannot FORCE you to do anything against your will. Unless you fear their penalties more than God. Pick your side. The disgusting and poisonous DEMs, or God. It really is that simple. If we lose our tax status, so what? A smaller church might be a better, more devout one. Close the catholic hospitals and schools if we must and see how easily the govt fills in the gap. If they can. What to do if we are sued in an effort to force the hiring of sexually inappropriate folks to become Catholic school teachers and church employees?? Say no. If indeed they shut us down, what can be done? Well, I think if I write a weekly invitation to my priest to celebrate Mass in my PRIVATE home ( as in the days of the old church in Rome)I will invite my friends too, and nobody else. What can they do about that? Nothing. End of story. There are ways to accomplish anything. All it takes is a spine and a will, and willingness to stand up for what you believe no matter WHAT the talking pin-heads are saying.
Amen, LJ!
I wish our bishops had the spirit, the faith and the love of our Lord Jesus that you do!
I don’t mean to be “digging at” the Holy Father. The Holy Father did say to legalize homosexual “civil union” and he has not retracted it. He hasn’t even said if the video of that, that was released, was made public with or without his permission or if it is a fraud in some manner.
What is to be made of it?
Man does not have power to legalize unnaturalness and abominations and the Pope has neither the power as Pope nor mandate for any such thing.
“Minutes before the vote, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, a Catholic, called the act a ‘historic step forward in Democrats’ fight to defend the dignity and equality of every American.'”
Nancy Pelosi isn’t a Catholic. She is a heretic.
“DOMA, which the bill would repeal, is a 1996 law signed by President Bill Clinton that defined marriage federally as the union of a man and a woman, reserved federal benefits to heterosexual couples, and permitted states not to recognize same-sex marriages contracted in other states. DOMA was already effectively nullified by the 2013 and 2015 Supreme Court decisions United States v. Windsor and Obergefell v. Hodges, which legalized same-sex marriage in all 50 states.”
The government (including the courts) has no power or authority to redefine marriage. Marriage is a matter of nature and was defined and instituted by God and is regulated by God and His Church – i.e. the Catholic Church.
To be validly married not only words, but also consummation is necessary. This is a matter of divine and natural law. It should be obvious that consummation is only possible between a physically mature male and female.
As far as I can tell, government is becoming more evil as time goes on. The rot is very deep and much of it appears to be very well hidden (e.g. not publicized) – and it is not confined to the federal government.
The Democrats – and some Republicans – have blood on their hands. They will be held accountable before God.
As Catholics ought to know, those guilty of unrepented mortal sin will go to Hell.
“Nancy Pelosi isn’t a Catholic. She is a heretic.”
She is a baptized Catholic. By all indications, she’s a very bad Catholic who holds to heretical views about life, sexuality, the human person, etc.