Let’s build a bridge. No—not that bridge. Not a warm, fuzzy, attention-getting bridge between the Church and the ‘LGBT Community,’ whose architects are misguided masters of error, ambiguity, confusion, and dissent. Don’t waste your time. Across the globe, we already have built more than a hundred bridges that actually lead to a Catholic sanctuary for those with same-sex attraction. It’s called the Courage apostolate, along with its companion apostolate for families of those with SSA, called EnCourage.
No, the bridge we really need to build right now is a replacement for the bridge that was burned and destroyed over the last century or more. We need to come to terms with how we’ve wandered so far away from the truth of who we really are as human persons. We need to look back on the road we’ve traveled and find a way back to the smoldering ash and timber of the bridge we first crossed and then set ablaze long ago.
We need to rebuild that bridge so that we can get back home where we belong.
Here’s the problem: it’s been about 150 years since we were really “home,” and most folks alive today have no idea what that home looks like. Before we can go back, we need to rediscover what “home” really is and how we moved so far away from it.
From the beginning (two centuries ago) it was not so…
Many Catholics today already possess the intuition that there is a crucial link, so to speak, between Humanae Vitae and homosexuality. They can see how the severing of the unitive and procreative meanings of marital relations—and the reduction of marital relations to mere “sex”—paved the way for the ideologies of “orientation” and “gender” that generate so-called “sexual minorities” and “sexual identities.”
Yet, the genie was let out of the bottle so long ago that most of us can no longer see just how glaringly obvious this connection really is. To get a glimpse, one needs to go back to the beginning of the ideological roots that gave us “homosexuality” and “heterosexuality” and spawned the chaos we have now.
A show of hands, please: How many of you know that the term “heterosexual” was originally used to describe a condition that was considered, in clinical terms, like the term “homosexual,” to be “morbid” or “pathological”?
That’s right. These terms were first brought into use in the last decades of the 19th-century by psychologists seeking to classify sexual attractions, emotions, and acts—not persons, not “identities”—associated with sexual abnormality. Of course, this begs the question—if even “heterosexual” was pathological, what was considered “normal” sexual attraction, emotion, and act?
Normal sexual desires and behaviors all had procreative sex as their focus. Acts and desires that directed a person toward procreative sexual activity (acts that properly could lead to procreation) were considered “normal.” Acts and desires reflecting a “morbid passion” for non-procreative sex acts with someone of the other sex were classified as “heterosexual.” Similarly, acts and desires reflecting a “morbid passion” for obviously non-procreative sex acts with someone of the same sex were classified as “homosexual.” How many people are aware of this?
The original thinking of those who popularized the terms “homosexual” and “heterosexual” was aligned with the natural-law truths upheld by the Catholic Church regarding God’s plan that the only normal and natural expression of sexual behavior is marital relations that are always open to procreation. Frustrating the procreative potential of sexual activity was always wrong. It is what so many psychologists of that late 19th century saw as “pathological.”
The seismic shift away from this thinking occurred mainly in the early 20th century—because of the birth control movement. The more socially acceptable birth control became, the greater the need to eliminate the procreative framework associated with categorizing non-procreative heterosexual behavior as “abnormal.” The “Roaring” 1920s reflect that transition, with some medical dictionaries by 1923 still referring to “heterosexuality” as “morbid passion,” while by the end of the decade, the first mainline Christian denomination (the now infamous Anglican Lambeth Conference of 1930) allowed the use of contraception by its members.
And so the new “normal” emerged—the term “heterosexual” was untethered from its “morbid” status and “procreative sex” fell by the wayside as a norm. A new norm began to emerge: the bright line between normal and abnormal was no longer whether your acts were procreative or non-procreative, but was instead about “who” your sex partner was.
The ironic twist here is that normalizing heterosexuality by accepting contraception effectively escalated the stigma associated with having homosexual tendencies. The “we-they” divide, so to speak, focused mostly, and more overtly, on whether your partner was same-sex or not.
Society had stepped firmly upon this bridge that led away from home, and promptly struck the first spark that would ultimately set the whole structure ablaze.
From acts to “identity”
Meanwhile, another evolution in thinking was underway. While the psychological distinction that saw homosexuality as a mental disorder held sway, more radical thinkers were thinking that, if this is the “kind” of person who commits these pathological sex acts, then maybe the prevalent view that “heterosexuality” was the mark of sexual maturity wasn’t quite right. Non-heterosexuality in all its forms was viewed basically as some form of sexual “immaturity” that could be overcome with treatments intended to direct a person to heterosexual maturity. But maybe people who committed homosexual acts were a different “kind” of person altogether, some theorized.
If homosexual attraction were somehow innate and fixed, then no amount of intervention would likely alter the homosexual inclination. Further, then homosexual activity could be said to constitute acts “proper” to this kind of person. It could be said that the homosexual inclination represented this person’s identity—they didn’t merely “have” these attractions or “do” homosexual acts. These people actually “were” homosexuals.
The decade of the 1950s ushered in pockets of such thinking, with the first few groups being organized to promote the “rights” of this new “kind” of person—the homosexual. Both individual and communal “identities” were being formed and enhanced well beyond what had existed in the past. But because of the continuing social stigma, and the accompanying illegality of homosexual acts, these efforts were fundamentally underground.
In fact, at this time the origin of the term “coming out” was actually a rather precise parallel to the social convention of a debutante’s “coming out” to polite society as a young, marriageable prospect for interested young men. When a homosexual “came out” in this era, it was his “debut” to this underground community—he was, still in secret, letting this still-hidden group know he was the “kind” of person ready to behave as a homosexual behaves. It was still not a fully formed declaration of “identity,” but it was close to it.
Even so, this pushed society further out onto the bridge, unconcerned as the smoke and flame billowed from behind.
From “identity” to “pride”
What truly crystallized the ideologies of orientation and gender into a panoply of newly recognized identities was the civil unrest of the 1960s, energized by the civil rights movement and the patterns established by a variety of “minority” groups seeking to claim their public place in society.
Alongside this was the advent of the hormonal contraceptive “Pill” and the growing pro-abortion movement, both of which brought renewed attention to the divorce of procreation and sex. As so-called “straights” clamored for their “reproductive rights” and worshipped at the idolatrous altar of “the Pill,” as “free love” won the day and sexual promiscuity was celebrated as liberation, and as racial strife brought prejudice and oppression into the media spotlight, the still-largely-underground “homosexual community” took notice.
Their timing was optimal for the explosive revolution of “gay liberation.” It had been decades since society had set aside the procreative standard for sex. Anti-sodomy laws were viewed as antiquated—after all, didn’t “straights” sometimes do that, too? Right around the time of the perfect storm that gave us the Stonewall Riots in 1969, the slogans “gay is good” and “gay pride” had won the day.
By then, even “coming out” had morphed into “coming out of the closet.” To be “gay” was now to claim publicly one’s own personal identity, which brought with it not only entry into the “gay community” but also public status as an unfairly stigmatized “sexual minority” whose civil rights needed protection because, just like race, “sexual orientation” was now a permanent part of “who I am.”
And how could “heterosexuals” object? They had their own “straight liberation” decades before, when non-procreative heterosexual sex became the new normal.
Not only could the rest of the world not object to “gay pride,” it was now up to every person to make the socially correct choice. You either had to accept and affirm—not merely tolerate—this newly liberated “kind” of person who didn’t just act a certain way but was “gay” to the core, or you were a bigot, a hater, a “homophobe,” to be socially reviled just like any run-of-the-mill racist.
The end of the bridge was now in sight. But what was that smell of burning wood…and sulfur?
From “pride” to…procreation?
Both the irony and audacity of “pride” is clear in what has followed since then. Initially, the “LGBT community” reassured society that it didn’t want what “straights” had—marriage, and children. No, no it would be enough just not to be “hated.” But the goalposts constantly moved—no, we don’t want marriage, just civil unions! And if you object, you hate us. Now we want marriage—it’s our right. Let us have it or you hate us.
Now, in a twisted way, we’ve come full circle, back to the beginning, the point at which procreative potential is desired, but on human terms, not on God’s terms. What was readily jettisoned by “heterosexuals” a century ago is now the “marital” accessory, expectation, and demand of same-sex “marriages”: children at all costs.
It’s as though this bridge brought us to a remarkable destination. We’ve arrived at the end of the road—and we stare into a massive, rippled fun-house mirror that shows us in its own twisted reflection the extent of the monumental destruction our journey really caused. We see tortured versions of that which we sought to escape, through the smoke and dust of the hellish horizon of our past.
What would have happened if, a century ago, procreation had remained the benchmark for sexual normalcy, as even the promoters of “heterosexual” and “homosexual” originally accepted?
We’ll never know.
An error in the beginning is an error indeed. There is no path forward, except through the looking-glass, the twisted fun-house mirror that confronts us.
There is only one real way home. We need to turn around, stop burning our bridges, and begin to build again.