Reflections on St. Pope John Paul II’s “Letter to the Elderly”

May is Older Americans Month, a time to reflect upon the contributions and gifts of older Americans and to “reaffirm our commitment to serving” them. Thus, it’s a good time to reflect on the wisdom that St. John Paul II imparted in his 1999 letter to the elderly.

Within this rich and beautiful letter, we see the pontiff’s great love and respect for the elderly. In the opening paragraph, he states that “the gift of life, for all the effort and pain it involves, is too beautiful and precious for us ever to grow tired of it.”

And so begin his words of encouragement, compassion, and tenderness for a group of people too often dismissed or even discarded. As he writes,

We see that among some peoples old age is esteemed and valued, while among others this is much less the case, due to a mentality which gives priority to immediate human usefulness and productivity. Such an attitude frequently leads to contempt for the later years of life, while older people themselves are led to wonder whether their lives are still worthwhile.

This is indeed an enormous problem we face today, especially as more and more states have begun to legalize physician-assisted suicide, in essence telling older persons that their lives are no longer worthwhile. The elderly may have long since retired from what many deem “important” work. They may face health problems, faltering eyesight, faulty memories, or hands and legs that don’t work as well. But one thing remains—their human dignity, for every human being is created in the image and likeness of God. And that will never diminish. So it’s up to each one of us to help older people understand that their lives do still have value, regardless of their abilities.

To ensure that the elderly continue to know they are valued and important, St. John Paul encouraged family members to keep their loved ones at home as long as possible and to care for them within the home environment. He explains,

As the number of older people increases, keeping pace with the rise in average life expectancy, it will become more and more important to promote a widespread attitude of acceptance and appreciation of the elderly, and not relegate them to the fringes.

As I ponder his words, I cannot help but think of the examples illustrated by my own parents as they ministered to family members. Both my parents lovingly cared for my maternal grandmother, who suffered from Alzheimer’s and who, by the end of her life, was often very confused. Though distance separated our home and hers, my parents did what they could when they could, which included having her stay with us on occasion. My sweet grandmother, who had always brightened up her home and who made us all feel so welcome with her joy, laughter, and out-of-this-world donuts and cinnamon rolls, often didn’t know who we were. But that was okay because we knew who she was, and that was the most important thing.

Later in life, my parents took care of my father’s uncle, who was a retired Holy Cross priest. While he did live in a nearby retirement facility for priests, they spent countless hours keeping him company, taking him out for coffee at his favorite restaurant, and just talking to him. It wasn’t always easy, but they loved him as Christ loves us: unconditionally.

I also think of my friend Jennifer, who regularly sat with a now-deceased elderly neighbor and kept her company by reading aloud to her and simply conversing about anything and everything. Through stories of her early life, Jennifer learned so much about “Grammy,” as she called her. They genuinely enjoyed each other’s company, and Jennifer remembers, “The age did not matter. We grew to be friends. She really was a friend, and I was a friend to her.”

In each of these scenarios, the people ministering to the elderly not only brought joy and solace to those they cared for, but they gained something immeasurable—the ability to open their hearts to someone who truly needed the company of another human being. And they were able to see the world through the eyes of someone who had lived through world wars, who had raised families, who had served the Church, or who had great wisdom and knowledge to share.

St. John Paul spoke of the immense importance of this, saying,

Elderly people help us to see human affairs with greater wisdom, because life’s vicissitudes have brought them knowledge and maturity. They are the guardians of our collective memory, and thus the privileged interpreters of that body of ideals and common values which support and guide life in society. To exclude the elderly is in a sense to deny the past, in which the present is firmly rooted, in the name of a modernity without memory.

As a society, we must realize that wisdom should not die with the elderly. Older people have a responsibility to pass their wisdom to the young, and the young have a responsibility to listen.

St. John Paul II affirms this in his letter, as he briefly diverges and addresses young people, saying that he invites “them to remain close to the elderly.” He continues, “I urge you to do this with great love and generosity. Older people can give you much more than you can imagine.”

His words remind us that life is short and that we must live it with one goal in mind—to get to heaven. We can only do that if we love Christ, follow God’s commandments, and perform works of love and sacrifice for those around us. This requires action and a change of mindset, as today, young people seem to care more about their phones and social media than about listening to the words of wisdom of parents, grandparents, or other older family members.

But this disdain doesn’t have to persist, and it can be easily remedied if each one of us identifies one person in their lives who needs a friend, who needs help, or who simply needs company. I encourage everyone reading this to take some time to talk to God in prayer and discern how you can make an older person feel valued, cherished, and less lonely. Is it a once-a-week coffee or dinner date with a grandparent? Is it a regular phone call to an elderly family member? Is it helping a neighbor with yard work or picking up groceries? Maybe it’s sitting with someone and just reading a book or listening to music together.

There’s so much we can all do, and there’s no greater gift than time. When you give people your time, they come to understand that they are worth your efforts and that they have value. And that can be the difference between a person feeling lonely and useless and him feeling wanted and cherished.

In the book of Sirach, we read, “If you are willing to listen, you can learn; if you pay attention, you can be instructed. Stand in the company of the elders; stay close to whoever is wise.”

Let us take those words to heart and stay close to the elderly—to the wise—for by doing so, we will not only make a profound impact on their lives, but we will help them realize that, indeed, life is too beautiful and precious for them to ever grow tired of it.