Denver, Colo., Jan 30, 2019 / 04:05 am (CNA).- Pope John Paul II was born Karol Wojtyla, a man from a small town in Poland who lost all of his immediate family – mom, older brother, an infant sister, and father – by the time he was 20 years old. Shortly thereafter, he vowed a life of celibacy as a Catholic priest. And yet, Wojtyla would go on to be remembered as “Pope of the Family.”
25 years ago next week, on Feb. 2, 1994, Pope John Paul II penned his “Letter to Families,” the subject of which was spurred by the United Nations’ declaration that 1994 would be the “Year of the Family.”
At the time, U.S. divorce rates were higher – about 4.6 per 1,000 people, compared with 2.9 in 2017. But marriage rates were also higher – 9.1 compared with 6.9 for those same years. Legalized same-sex marriage was still considered a taboo political idea, and would remain so for more than a decade. And Bruce Jenner still went by Bruce Jenner.
But even though it was written 25 years ago, many Catholics in family life ministries believe that the Church is only beginning to see the fruits of John Paul II’s message to families.
Although he was a celibate priest, Wojtyla became very close to a circle of young people whom he pastored while serving as chaplain to university students in Krakow. As they married and had children, Fr. Wojtyla offered spiritual and pastoral guidance to their families that would inform his work well into his years as Pope John Paul II.
“He was able to support these young families, to help them live the faith at a time when Communist society was really trying to undermine the family,” said Jared Staudt, who is the director of formation for the Archdiocese of Denver, where he also leads Building Family Culture retreats for families.
When the Communist Party ruled Poland, family’s work and school schedules were arranged in such a way that they spent as little time together as possible. The state, and not the family, was, according to the government, the ultimate good and end of society.
“So he was in this battle for family life very directly in Communist Poland,” he said of Wojtyla.
Much of what Wojtyla came to know about the sanctity and importance of marriage and family life can be found in his 1994 “Letter to Families.”
Man, woman and child – the family as vocation
John Paul II wrote prolifically on the family, but this letter is one of his more personal and concise works detailing much of his thought on marriage and family.
He was known for elevating the idea of the vocation of marriage and family life to a level that had not yet been articulated in the Catholic Church.
“John Paul literally started a revolution when it comes to the Catholic Church and family,” said Steve Bollman, founder of family ministry Paradisus Dei.
“What John Paul did is he truly identified the family as the pathway to holiness,” Bollman said. “In this letter, it’s the family that’s placed at the heart of the great struggle between good and evil, between life and death, between love and all that’s opposed to love.”
In his letter, John Paul II wrote that men and women, particularly in their roles as fathers and mothers in the family, are key to building up a “civilization of love,” in which families are able to give and receive love at individual and societal levels.
“If the first ‘way of the Church’ is the family, it should also be said that the civilization of love is also the ‘way of the Church’, which journeys through the world and summons families to this way; it summons also other social, national and international institutions, because of families and through families. The family in fact depends for several reasons on the civilization of love, and finds therein the reasons for its existence as family. And at the same time the family is the centre and the heart of the civilization of love,” John Paul II wrote (LTF 13).
Bollman said that by telling families that they were at the heart of the Church, it called them to holiness in a way that hadn’t yet been articulated.
“The vast majority of people become holy as a husband and father and wife and mother, not in spite of that,” Bollman said. John Paul II’s teachings on the family are at the foundation of Bollman’s work at Paradisus Dei, which includes a couple’s ministry, and That Man is You, a ministry for men that particularly focuses on their roles as husbands and fathers.
“Our tagline is, “Helping families discover the superabundance of God.” That’s what we are is we’re all about family and finding God within the family,” he said.
The family in crisis
Staudt called John Paul II’s letter “prophetic”, because it addresses not only the crucial importance of the family’s place in society, but some of the key ways it is under attack.
And if attacks on the family were urgent in 1994, they are all the more so today, Staudt said.
“John Paul’s famous line from the letter: ‘The history of mankind, the history of salvation, passes by way of the family,’ is actually chilling at this point,” Staudt noted, “because what we’re seeing is that we don’t have hope for the future, we’re not investing for the future of society or for the Church. We’re just living for the present moment for our own selfish desires. So I think John Paul was already recognizing that the foundation of society itself is already in jeopardy, if people are not getting married, if they’re not having kids, they’re saying no to the future.”
According to Pew Research, the marriage rate in the United States is currently hovering at around 50 percent, meaning half of U.S. adults aged 18 and older are married, a steep decline compared to the peak rate of 72 percent in 1960. The fertility rate is also at a 30-year low in the United States, and sits below replacement levels. As of 2014, less than half of children were living in a traditional nuclear home with their married mother and father.
By many measures, marriage and family life today are in crisis, in ways that are perhaps even more pronounced than when John Paul II wrote this letter.
“I think the ‘crisis of concepts’ that John Paul II speaks of is an enormous challenge for the family today,” Sr. John Mary, S.V., of the Sisters of Life, told CNA.
“Who can deny that our age is one marked by a great crisis, which appears above all as a profound ‘crisis of truth?’” John Paul II wrote. “A crisis of truth means, in the first place, a crisis of concepts. Do the words ‘love’, ‘freedom’, ‘sincere gift’, and even ‘person’ and ‘rights of the person’, really convey their essential meaning?” This crisis now seems to be even more profound than when the Pope first wrote these words, Sr. John Mary, S.V., a Sister of Life, told CNA.
“Even more so today than when the Letter to Families was written, modern culture does not recognize the truth of who the human person is, what we are made for, what constitutes a family, what freedom and human rights are,” she said. “So to truly live Christian family life becomes more and more radically countercultural. John Paul II addresses this in the letter by proposing the anthropology that corrects this crisis of concepts and allows for a civilization of love to grow by way of marriage and family,” she noted.
Another major challenge faced by families is the “radical individualism” present in current culture, Sr. John Mary said, which is something else John Paul II addressed in the letter.
According to John Paul II, radical individualism is “based on a faulty notion of freedom and proposes personalism as the antidote,” Sr. John Mary said. “The family is the first place where love is given and received. But if parents do not model authentic, self-giving love to their children, families become groups of persons pursuing their own selfish ends,” she said.
The ‘antidote’: John Paul II’s cure for a sick society
Though John Paul II’s descriptions of these crises and the current state of affairs of marriage and family in the world paint a dark picture, John Paul also provides for families and the Church a way out.
Bill Donaghy is a senior lecturer and content specialist with the Theology of the Body Institute. The mission of the Institute is to educate and train men and women to understand, live, and promote John Paul II’s teachings in his Theology of the Body.
Donaghy told CNA that not only does he consider John Paul II’s Letter to Families the blueprint to how to live a holy life personally as a husband and father, he also considers it the “antidote” to everything that goes against a “civilization of love.”
“Without a doubt in my mind, in the providence of God Who could foresee today’s crisis in marriage and the family, the attempt to redefine marriage and the explosion of gender ideologies that detach our identity from our humanity, St. John Paul II’s thought is the antidote, the cure, the clear truth of who we are and how we are to live as human persons made by Love,” he said.
“I think the vision presented in this letter is actually more relevant now than it was 25 years ago,” he said. “It contains the secret for our joy, the mystical meaning of marriage, the way home for the prodigal sons and daughters who’ve tried everything else to bring us joy and failed to find it.”
For himself, Donaghy said building the “civilization of love” starts in his own home – by treating his wife with love and respect, by spending time with and listening to his children, by modeling sacrificial love. At the parish level, he said the Church must help families by creating space for “real human interaction, conversation, and formation.”
“Again, the ‘Letter to Families’ is a goldmine of a teaching, a school of love for humanity. But we’ve got to make time and space for it to enter into the everyday dynamics of our own family,” he said.
Staudt too told CNA that the words and teachings of Pope John Paul II on the family have deeply inspired his work in family ministry.
“It really is through John Paul’s teachings, the letter and his other teachings…that I’ve discerned that the way to build Christian culture is through family life,” Staudt, who is also the father of 6, told CNA.
For the Building Family Culture retreats that he leads, Staudt said that he focuses on teaching families how to pray, the importance of which is heavily emphasized by John Paul II in his letter.
“Prayer must become the dominant element of the Year of the Family in the Church: prayer by the family, prayer for the family, and prayer with the family,” John Paul II wrote. “Prayer increases the strength and spiritual unity of the family, helping the family to partake of God’s own ‘strength.’”
“I think we take that for granted, that families know how to pray, and I don’t think they do. So I think that’s the foundation, that’s the core, and John Paul does talk a lot about that,” he said. After prayer, he also focuses on how to build a family culture, which includes doing things that form children’s imagination in positive and beautiful ways.
Staudt said he hopes that more in family ministry “wake up” to the urgency of helping families become what John Paul II has called them to be.
“I don’t think enough people have woken up to the urgency in supporting family life and really making that a priority in their parishes, their dioceses, in catechesis, in evangelization,” he said.
“John Paul I think is truly prophetic in pointing us to the fundamental realities of man, woman, human love, family life as crucial for the Church and society at this time, that these are the key issues that we need to face.”
Sr. John Mary and the Sisters of Life say they help build a “civilization of love” through the women they help in crisis pregnancies, the women they counsel after abortions, or the young people who are early on in their journey of faith.
Sr. John May said that because John Paul II was speaking about universal truths of the human person, his words will continue to be relevant for families and the Church throughout time. “John Paul’s Letter to Families explores universal truths: the goodness of the human person, the dignity of marriage, and the very real challenges facing families today,” she said. “Marriage and family are God’s plan to satisfy the universal longings of the human heart, so speaking of them is always timely.”
“We are all called to do something great with our life and our love,” she added. “We are made for love and communion with God and others. John Paul II reminds us of this lofty call, and encourages us that true love is possible.”
[…]
About the courageous Jennifer Roback Morse, yours truly recalls her vigorous testimony before the Legislature of the state of Washington in 2012, when legalization of gay “marriage” was on the docket, or on the table, or the bed, or whatever.
Testifying that same morning, here also was a quite handsome young man of twenty years, a poster child in white shirt and tie and whose parents divorced when he was twelve. After having been shaped by his father’s absence, he had recently reunited with his father–for whom he discovered that he now had a deep attachment. He would like to find an older man just like his father to intimately share the rest of his life. The bobble heads of legislators nodded in compassionate sympathy. Only moments before, in the crowded front of the chamber, two sympathetic male staffers, also in white shirts and ties, embraced each other with prolonged excitement, each chortling aloud without blushing, “I have ‘straight’ love. . . .”
The rest is history…
“In the regular November 2012 elections, voters for the first time approved the legalization of same-sex marriage by popular vote in three states: Maine, Maryland, and Washington [an unsuccessful referendum]. Maine’s law took effect on December 29, 2012. Maryland started allowing same-sex marriages on January 1, 2013. In Washington state, the first [FIRST!] licenses were distributed on December 6, with the first marriages on December 9 following the mandatory three-day waiting period [Wikipedia].”
Then, of course, the United States Supreme Court climbed in bed (5-4), reversing millennia of Civilization with the stroke of a pen, or whatever. Said Chief Justice John Roberts: “Celebrated today’s decision, but do not celebrate the Constitution.” https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2015/06/26/417720924/roberts-celebrate-todays-decision-but-do-not-celebrate-the-constitution
Well, I’m not surprised. The massive entertainment industry (even children’s entertainment), the artistic and creative industries (especially children’s authors of books), the political world, many influential companies that employ people at really good wages, and especially the academic community, along with many of the historically mainline churches (who seem to be bleeding members!) have all embraced and endorsed everything that the very powerful and visible Same Sex Lobby groups have presented as “facts”. These three social organizations, much more than the orthodox “religious world”, influence almost everyone, even devoted Christians.
I think that same sex couples can raise well-balanced children IF they include heterosexuals in their circles of friends and allow their children to spend time with coaches, teachers, friends, relatives, etc. who hold opposing views from them, and make it clear to the child that he/she is a unique individual who needs to follow the path that is really “them” and not try to be someone they are not. I think that’s tough for many younger people nowadays, who have swallowed the mantra that we can all “be all that we can be!”
I also think that’s tough for many “straight” (and LBGTQ+) parents who often expect their children to be something they’re not; e.g., very intelligent, or artistic, or “religious” or athletic (especially athletic!), or outgoing and popular, or contemplative and sensitive.
If SSA couples raise children who turn out to be well balanced it’s only through the Grace & Mercy of God, not because of their domestic circumstances.
It’s bad enough when a single parent has to raise a child without a mother or father due to death or desertion. Children can understand that. It’s entirely a different thing when a biological mother or father is purposely erased through an anonymous donor/surrogate.
Overturn Anthony Kennedy’s insane quackery woke-religion, which is absolutely abusive to all, especially children and young people.
Common Law [for the US the common law of England] conveyed to the legal mind traditions drawn from natural law, universally acknowledged legally observed standards, reasoned opinions, religious principles, stare decisis verdicts that were the basis for an ordered society.
As Chief Justice Roberts, Scalia, the other dissenting justices during the 2015 majority decision to permit same sex marriage, the Constitutional based understanding of marriage exclusively between a man and a woman, drawn from tradition, was struck down by a radical, irrational intrusion into that commonly held understanding.
It is the same as saying a man can be a woman, or that we cannot define what a woman is – which is exactly what has transpired since the 2015 Scotus decision. Logical or Right Reason has been undermined. Only a reversal of that decision can remove legality from that immoral madness. Unfortunately, ending the practice requires a moral conversion of our culture.
Catholicism in context must first put its own house in order regarding the trend toward normalizing homosexual behavior in house to be effective in reversing it in the general population. Otherwise homosexuality will lead to the destruction of mankind.
True, Father Peter. It is, in essence, discriminating against the essence of being, in essence, a Loving Husband or Wife, Father or Mother, in order to accommodate the engaging in or affirmation of sexual acts that regardless of the actors or the actors desire, even if the actors are a man and woman united in marriage as Husband and Wife, deny the Sanctity and Dignity of every Human Person, and are thus Physically, Psychologically, Spiritually, and Emotionally harmful. We can know through both Faith and reason, any follower of Jesus The Christ who desires to accommodate the engaging in or affirmation of demeaning sexual acts , which are disordered because they deny the Sanctity and Dignity of the marital act within The Sacrament of Holy Matrimony, and thus The Sanctity and Dignity of every Beloved Son or Daughter from the moment of conception to natural death, ipso facto separates oneself from The One Body Of Christ, due to the fact that Love, which is always rightly ordered to the personal and relational inherent Dignity of the persons existing in a relationship of Love, is devoid of every form of Lust.
“Catholicism in context must first put its own house in order regarding the trend toward normalizing homosexual behavior in house to be effective in reversing it in the general population. Otherwise homosexuality will lead to the destruction of mankind.”
Respectfully, Catholicism is ordered to The Word Of Perfect Divine Eternal Love Incarnate, Our Savior, Jesus, The Christ, thus Catholicism is in order and practiced by The Faithful, The One Body Of Christ, In The Unity Of The Holy Ghost.
Those who deny Christ’s Teaching on Sexual Morality, having ipso facto defected from The Catholic Faith, until they repent and affirm Christ’s teaching , are not to be counted among The Faithful, least it appear one can remain in communion with Christ and His One , Holy, Catholic, And Apostolic Church, while denying The Unity Of The Holy Ghost, The Perfect Divine Eternal Love Between The Father And His Only Begotten Son, Jesus The Christ, Who Proceeds From The Father And His Only Begotten Son, Jesus The Christ.
That divine ordering of the Mystical Body doesn’t ensure that all its members are living lives that reflect that order. That includes hierarchy. As such there’s sin in the Church today, the egregious sin of homosexuality. A faithful elect will remain to the end. In the end the Church teaches it is Christ who will be the victor of Satan and evil.
Natural Law, the reflexion of the Eternal Law as Aquinas teaches the Natural Law Within, refers to the innate ability to distinguish good from evil. We find it recognized by Cicero who said the law of nature is the same in Rome as it is in Athens.
It is prescient knowledge realized in the act of deliberation of a moral act. Which is why the Church says the Decalogue is a reminder God gave to Man through Moses. As a natural faculty we don’t require grace to apprehend the natural law, thus it’s the bedrock for conscience. Although grace assists in its apprehension and consistency in practice.
Apart from Natural Law there are laws or principles of behavior that surpass Natural Law and are revealed by the Holy Spirit. These revealed principles of behavior are those that are necessary for salvation and best recognized in Christ’s passion, and the willingness to suffer deficit to oneself for the good of others.
Tullius Cicero in De Legibus Book I says, “And there will not be different laws at Rome and at Athens, or different laws now and in the future, but one eternal and unchangeable law will be valid for all nations and all times”.
If the Ruth institute was founded for the purpose of defending traditional Christian marriage, would their endorsing any study pertaining to a defense of their position be a credible reason for believing it? Since we all tend to stack the deck in our favor there is little hope that their case is presented objectively. Is it likely that they would ever cite a study which came to opposite conclusions as being good or accurate? No not at all.
I am not making any statement about the mission or reputation of the Ruth Institute ( about this I am totally ignorant) , I’m only trying to make the point that it is very difficult if not impossible to defend our moral values by citing sociological studies. Professionals on both sides of the fence can come up with “studies “ which support their biases.
I am 100% pro traditional family values and I don’t need any study to confirm it and no number of opposing studies will ever change my mind. Period.
I think you might have it backward, James – the Ruth Institute isn’t endorsing the Regnerus study; the Regnerus study affirms the Ruth Institute’s positions. I’m no sociologist, and I haven’t poured over any of the data or read the study; but based on the commentary provided by the Cornell Sociologists from their Multiverse Analysis on Regnerus’ data, it sounds like they were hoping to discredit Regnerus’ study; but instead re-affirmed his result. That said, the point of the article seems to say that there is scholarly, robust research (even in the field of Sociology! and even from a school like The University of Texas!), that reaffirms the value of providing traditional marriages and family composition for the material welfare of offspring.
I think i remember that The Ruth Institute tries to help victims of the Sexual Revolution. Defending marriage would correlate with that goal I guess.
Surely you wouldn’t reject every study an organization like The Ruth Institute makes public on the grounds that studies with differing outcomes exist?
I’m cautious about these kind of things too but you’d have to look at the criteria and populations studied to make a comparison.
Studies and polls do mean something but they can also be set up for certain outcomes.
From an NCR article today:” Jennifer Roback Morse, Ph.D., is founder and president of the Ruth Institute, which helps the victims of the Sexual Revolution recover from their experiences and become advocates for positive change.”
A premise for homosexuality’s universal expansion and the destruction of mankind is the dissolution of moral principles that correctly direct the will toward its correct object. Remove those rational, religiously held principles and the will loses its direction toward a due end. Reason wanders where pleasure leads it, abnormal sexuality becomes an option solely based on pleasure.
And the absence of a well formed conscience!
Do we really see distingush between a same sex home from a broken home? Perhaps I don’t.
God created two sexes, not one. Homosexual activity is abhorrent. But the progressive movement looks to expand recognition of Gay rights. The dilemma for straights is how we conduct our relationship with Gays going forward?
Can we isolate them? I have Gay friends. Will there be a bill to outlaw same sex marriage? Will that attempt at containment trigger violence? There have been many attempts to evangelize Gays. A major attempt was made in Minnesota…
Several years ago, former U.S. Rep. Michelle Bachmann and her husband Marcus created a “clinic” using the slogan “Pray the Gay away”. They practiced “Conversion Theory”. It was closed for improper record keeping. The “impact” of the clinic remains largely unknown, except for several men who said their mental anguish was the result.
We must continue our trek to “address” the issue. However, it remains an issue until we know how we do it. God help us.
‘Do we really see distingush between a same sex home from a broken home? ”
***************
Yes, Mr. Morgan I think so. While prison populations are largely boys from single parent homes that can reflect poverty as well as the absence of a father in the home.
I’m guessing psychological issues will look different when children are “created” through anonymous donors & surrogates. I know a woman who found out her conception happened in that fashion & she had a real breakdown. It completely turned her world upside down.
Children aren’t pets or commodities. They have inherent human rights & one of those is to know & have a relationship with their father & mother, if living. And their extended family also.
mrscracker: so much truth in what you write. Shout it from the rooftops!
Thank you, Deacon Edward and God bless you.
“Reality is greater than ideas” – what reality, which idea? When? How?
The reality that man is biologically grounded which necessarily informs his interior and his society
Or
That state of affairs where delinquents and criminality are not backing off “so therefore” -the therefore being a mental idea process- “therefore” they must be facilitated – a combination of moralized obliging “must”/“ought” and of creating activity and directing action for real
With the latter being given not only ascendancy but being presented as absolute.
Very sad. My cousin and his wife are still friends with two women (I knew them in HS, younger than me, but don’t think they were gay then or they hid it).
When gay started to be “accepted” in society they came out. They married when that became a thing you could do. They ended up “adopting” 2 babies who are mid/late teens. We were all at a picnic and my aunt heard the boy, sadly lament saying, “I’m never going to have a dad”. It broke my heart. Unfortunately, he did while growing up, had a lot of behavior issues. I suspected because his family wasn’t “normal” and wanted a dad like other families. Horrible. His sister also had some difficulty, but she “seems” sort of ok in comparison, but she has females that are like her. Although, not having a dad could cause bad decisions when dating/marrying. It’s hard to be around them, the boy is miserable, the girl trying to deal with it and the “moms” look miserable /unhappy too, bc the kids aren’t completely happy. I’m sure the son has told them what he thinks and resents them or even hates them for doing that to him. Extremely heart breaking.
I had thought what would I think if I was in that situation. I’d be confused, and feel like I wasn’t grounded. And I’d totally lament not having what most people had a dad and a mom. I’d probably run away and stay at a friend’s if I could or ask family members if they could adopt me! I would be beyond miserable.
Wish I could adopt their kids and get them out of that selfish situation. How could you make a decision to have kids without thinking about the repercussions that they would have to endure-being made fun of in school-haha you don’t have a dad/mom.
If one chooses to act on their propensity toward homosexual, don’t adopt or surrogate children. You bringing them up in an unnatural situation., that in most cases cause harm-confused, behavioral/ anger, self-harm or suicide. It’s one thing if people make their own decision to be gay, but, don’t drag children into it. 🙏🏻
Re Fr. Morelli above (7:17) – “Unfortunately, ending the practice requires a moral conversion of our culture”.
Agreed. A tall order but that’s what’s required.
I note that the Baptists have urged a rethinking of Obergefell.
From a phenomenological perspective, imagine for a moment the life experience of a person who comes to know the fact that his/her life began as a result of the union of donated ova and sperm in a petri dish adopted by two (or three or four since laws are indeed fungible) homosexuals. Imagine for a moment that this is you.
There will always be problems when we encourage the patients to run the hospitals and the lunatics to run the asylums. It is doubtful that the Creator made a mistake in creating men and women with their unassailable characteristics and function for reproduction of their species.